VIDEOS
Lee Gibson
The lived experiences from those impacted by incarceration are some of the most interesting testimonies in this world. Having walked through prison yards and college quads I was fortunate to see this animation project from many angles. This animation project focussed on the health of those that are in our carceral setting and how it is communicated through their day to day lives. These are but a few layers of the truck load of onions that actually make up the tale of a life lived. Animation has such an incredible ability to give the viewer a side of the testimony, in the experiencers own words, while adding stunning visuals to enhance one's empathetic understanding. It is truly an honor to share space with both those inside and the creators of the animations. Intention versus interpretation may not always tell the whole story but it gives space for curiosity and exploration.
The lived experiences from those impacted by incarceration are some of the most interesting testimonies in this world. Having walked through prison yards and college quads I was fortunate to see this animation project from many angles. This animation project focussed on the health of those that are in our carceral setting and how it is communicated through their day to day lives. These are but a few layers of the truck load of onions that actually make up the tale of a life lived. Animation has such an incredible ability to give the viewer a side of the testimony, in the experiencers own words, while adding stunning visuals to enhance one's empathetic understanding. It is truly an honor to share space with both those inside and the creators of the animations. Intention versus interpretation may not always tell the whole story but it gives space for curiosity and exploration.
1.
THE THREE JEWELS: MY PATH TO BALANCE BEHIND BARS
1.
THE THREE JEWELS: MY PATH TO BALANCE BEHIND BARS
CSULBS: Sheila V. Lopez Bolanos, Zoe Kim
Hello, we are students at Cal State LA, both pursuing a Bachelors of Art degree in Art for animation. We believe in the art of story telling, through animation. We decided to work as a team because we both share similar beliefs. We think that animation is a beautiful medium, and that it is powerful enough to transcend messages that can help us understand one another slightly better than the day before.
Process: During the beginning of the project we had the option to choose a story among many. The excerpt, The three jewels: My path to balance behind bars by Ninh Nguyen, stood out to us the most because we were able to relate to some of the themes and values of the story. For this project, the creation process started with listening. In one of our class meetings with some of the former prisoners, we sat among our classmates and listened to the experiences of growth and development that the CSULA program has brought to many of the prisoners. Having this in mind, we envisioned a story told through Ninh Nguyen. We imagined what this story would be like as a reflection towards the past in a form of a memory. While, also keeping the Voice Over and the identities discussed in the story in mind. In the animation, the three identities that were explored were being Vietnamese-American, Buddhist, and CSULA student. We thought about how each identity would be represented carefully because we didn’t want to misrepresent Ninh Nguyen or his beliefs. We don’t know Ninh Nguyen but we know his story. And to the best of our abilities we tried to envision it. What we’ve learned: In this process we learned that research is really important and that timing is everything. As animators we will be forever learning, and we hope that through these processes we will eventually get it right.
Hello, we are students at Cal State LA, both pursuing a Bachelors of Art degree in Art for animation. We believe in the art of story telling, through animation. We decided to work as a team because we both share similar beliefs. We think that animation is a beautiful medium, and that it is powerful enough to transcend messages that can help us understand one another slightly better than the day before.
Process: During the beginning of the project we had the option to choose a story among many. The excerpt, The three jewels: My path to balance behind bars by Ninh Nguyen, stood out to us the most because we were able to relate to some of the themes and values of the story. For this project, the creation process started with listening. In one of our class meetings with some of the former prisoners, we sat among our classmates and listened to the experiences of growth and development that the CSULA program has brought to many of the prisoners. Having this in mind, we envisioned a story told through Ninh Nguyen. We imagined what this story would be like as a reflection towards the past in a form of a memory. While, also keeping the Voice Over and the identities discussed in the story in mind. In the animation, the three identities that were explored were being Vietnamese-American, Buddhist, and CSULA student. We thought about how each identity would be represented carefully because we didn’t want to misrepresent Ninh Nguyen or his beliefs. We don’t know Ninh Nguyen but we know his story. And to the best of our abilities we tried to envision it. What we’ve learned: In this process we learned that research is really important and that timing is everything. As animators we will be forever learning, and we hope that through these processes we will eventually get it right.
LS: Ninh Nguyen
I was born in Vietnam. My family fled the country just before the Vietnam War ended. Eventually, my family settled in Orange County, California, where I grew up in the late 70s and early 80s when the community was mostly white. Currently, I’m a student at Cal State LA majoring in communication through the Prison Bachelor College Program.
Growing up I was teased for being Asian and I felt embarrassed of my culture. I don’t feel the same way anymore. Now, I’m proud of my ethnic and cultural heritage. As a member of the silent minority, I think it’s important for people to hear from the voiceless and break the myth of Asian as “The model minority”.
In sharing my story, I feel nervous and excited at the same time. For the first time I feel like I have a voice.
I was born in Vietnam. My family fled the country just before the Vietnam War ended. Eventually, my family settled in Orange County, California, where I grew up in the late 70s and early 80s when the community was mostly white. Currently, I’m a student at Cal State LA majoring in communication through the Prison Bachelor College Program.
Growing up I was teased for being Asian and I felt embarrassed of my culture. I don’t feel the same way anymore. Now, I’m proud of my ethnic and cultural heritage. As a member of the silent minority, I think it’s important for people to hear from the voiceless and break the myth of Asian as “The model minority”.
In sharing my story, I feel nervous and excited at the same time. For the first time I feel like I have a voice.
2.
FROM LETTERS TO VISITS IN PRISON: A PAST RELATIONSHIP BECOMES PRESENT AGAIN
2.
FROM LETTERS TO VISITS IN PRISON: A PAST RELATIONSHIP BECOMES PRESENT AGAIN
LS: Thaisan Nguon
My name is Thaisan Nguon and I am 40 years old. I was born in Cambodia and came to America when I was about a year old, give or take a few months. My family and I came to America to escape the Cambodian genocide and although we arrived here with nothing but our names, we carried a lot of baggage. I myself did not experience the horrors of the genocide the same way my parents and older sister did; nonetheless I experienced it in ways that their trauma has manifested through them into me. As the years passed by and they learned how to mask/suppress/deal with their trauma, I was left alone to negotiate a new iteration of the genocide’s trauma. The most vivid impression I have felt from this phenomenon was… not being wanted. This feeling had haunted me my whole life as I trekked down many wrong roads in pursuit of changing the narrative. I wanted to be accepted… I wanted to be valued… I wanted to be embraced… I WANTED TO BE LOVED. That is what inspired me to share my story about rekindled love. Yes, on the surface of the story, it is about me getting back with my ex-girlfriend, but metaphorically, the story represents something bigger than that event. It speaks to the presence of something always being within reach, no matter how many wrong turns were made or obstacles there were to overcome. Whether it be love (romantic or otherwise), reconciliation (with a friend or family), or freedom (be it psychological or physical) our agency as human beings will set us up for that success. It is my great hope that those who view my spoken words will come away with a new lens that will strengthen the optimism and hope that already resides in them. When I wrote this story about rekindled love, my parents and I were years into a dialogue that explored the generational trauma left on us by the genocide; reconciliation was in progress. A year or so after writing this story, the psychological freedom that I possessed through higher education and self-rehabilitation was matched with the Governor’s grant of commuting my life without parole sentence; physical freedom is right around the corner for now. So again, let me say, something is always within reach.
My name is Thaisan Nguon and I am 40 years old. I was born in Cambodia and came to America when I was about a year old, give or take a few months. My family and I came to America to escape the Cambodian genocide and although we arrived here with nothing but our names, we carried a lot of baggage. I myself did not experience the horrors of the genocide the same way my parents and older sister did; nonetheless I experienced it in ways that their trauma has manifested through them into me. As the years passed by and they learned how to mask/suppress/deal with their trauma, I was left alone to negotiate a new iteration of the genocide’s trauma. The most vivid impression I have felt from this phenomenon was… not being wanted. This feeling had haunted me my whole life as I trekked down many wrong roads in pursuit of changing the narrative. I wanted to be accepted… I wanted to be valued… I wanted to be embraced… I WANTED TO BE LOVED. That is what inspired me to share my story about rekindled love. Yes, on the surface of the story, it is about me getting back with my ex-girlfriend, but metaphorically, the story represents something bigger than that event. It speaks to the presence of something always being within reach, no matter how many wrong turns were made or obstacles there were to overcome. Whether it be love (romantic or otherwise), reconciliation (with a friend or family), or freedom (be it psychological or physical) our agency as human beings will set us up for that success. It is my great hope that those who view my spoken words will come away with a new lens that will strengthen the optimism and hope that already resides in them. When I wrote this story about rekindled love, my parents and I were years into a dialogue that explored the generational trauma left on us by the genocide; reconciliation was in progress. A year or so after writing this story, the psychological freedom that I possessed through higher education and self-rehabilitation was matched with the Governor’s grant of commuting my life without parole sentence; physical freedom is right around the corner for now. So again, let me say, something is always within reach.
3.
FAMILY VIEWS
3.
FAMILY VIEWS
LS: Andrew “Kicking Horse” McCarter
Written and narrated by Andrew ”Kicking Horse” McCarter, a 64-year-old Native American undergraduate of the California State University Los Angeles, Lancaster campus.
This narrative describes the turmoil of growing up in the 1960s in East Texas as an economically poor child of color, experiencing the effects of alcoholism in a one-parent family with two other siblings.
Written and narrated by Andrew ”Kicking Horse” McCarter, a 64-year-old Native American undergraduate of the California State University Los Angeles, Lancaster campus.
This narrative describes the turmoil of growing up in the 1960s in East Texas as an economically poor child of color, experiencing the effects of alcoholism in a one-parent family with two other siblings.
4.
A CHILD LOST AMONG LOST PEOPLE
4.
A CHILD LOST AMONG LOST PEOPLE
CSULBS: Marco Moncada
I am a student of animation with a drive to create compelling animated stories. I am very much interested in new forms of animations such as the mix of 2D and 3D animations and strongly believe could form great works in the future.
For this project, I chose to keep a majority of the colors in darkened values with the slow change in the main character's color. In my work process, I discovered and utilized different ways in which symbolism could be used in replace of direct representation in my animation.
I am a student of animation with a drive to create compelling animated stories. I am very much interested in new forms of animations such as the mix of 2D and 3D animations and strongly believe could form great works in the future.
For this project, I chose to keep a majority of the colors in darkened values with the slow change in the main character's color. In my work process, I discovered and utilized different ways in which symbolism could be used in replace of direct representation in my animation.
LS: Dara Yin
Dara Yin is a 38 year old Cal State Los Angeles Student. He committed his crime at the age of 18 and is serving a Life without Parole sentence. For the last five years he has been working with youth through a youth diversion program at Lancaster Prison. He is also a dog trainer with Paws For Life. He facilitates various programs to help the incarcerated men find change. Programs such as C.R.T (Community Restoration Training), A.V.P (Alternative to Violence Project), and G.O.G.I (Getting Out By Going In). Embodying change and helping others is how he chooses to live his life new.
Dara Yin is a 38 year old Cal State Los Angeles Student. He committed his crime at the age of 18 and is serving a Life without Parole sentence. For the last five years he has been working with youth through a youth diversion program at Lancaster Prison. He is also a dog trainer with Paws For Life. He facilitates various programs to help the incarcerated men find change. Programs such as C.R.T (Community Restoration Training), A.V.P (Alternative to Violence Project), and G.O.G.I (Getting Out By Going In). Embodying change and helping others is how he chooses to live his life new.
5.
BEING REASONABLE ABOUT UNREASONABLE
5.
BEING REASONABLE ABOUT UNREASONABLE
CSULBS: Stephann Lalanne
I'm an animation student at Cal state LA, who came from San Diego to pursue his childhood dream. I wanted my animation to capture the same emotions the author was presenting his in work. I decided to use more realistic aspect to make the audience feel as if they are in his shoe. As if they were in trial and not giving an opportunity to have their freedom. In the end, it was an interesting experience to learn about the live of those in prison from their journey in the being to where they are now.
I'm an animation student at Cal state LA, who came from San Diego to pursue his childhood dream. I wanted my animation to capture the same emotions the author was presenting his in work. I decided to use more realistic aspect to make the audience feel as if they are in his shoe. As if they were in trial and not giving an opportunity to have their freedom. In the end, it was an interesting experience to learn about the live of those in prison from their journey in the being to where they are now.
LS: Justin Hong
I am a 32-year-old Korean-American born in Los Angeles and have been incarcerated since I was 18 years old. I’m a proud student of Cal State Los Angeles with the passion to help and positively impact others through education and art. I believe in the human capacity to change and that we are not defined by our worst moments.
I was denied parole during the time I was enrolled in Dr. Afary’s class. I was still processing my emotions and my denial when Dr. Afary gave us assignments to journal, according to the week’s chapter. Writing this story was a way for me to cope with the difficult situation and to find peace.
My story represents the redemption process, the good, the bad, and the ugly. While there are many of us who have changed from the person we were when we committed our crimes, it does not mean that we are not still held accountable for all our actions. My story shows the resilience of those who fail when faced with obstacles yet continue to live positive and productive lives while incarcerated.
Sharing such a vulnerable experience was a scary idea. I actually had second thoughts about if I wanted to share this story with the public. However, seeing the effort and care the students took to create and bring my story to life was inspiring. I’m grateful to be a part of this project and to share my story.
I am a 32-year-old Korean-American born in Los Angeles and have been incarcerated since I was 18 years old. I’m a proud student of Cal State Los Angeles with the passion to help and positively impact others through education and art. I believe in the human capacity to change and that we are not defined by our worst moments.
I was denied parole during the time I was enrolled in Dr. Afary’s class. I was still processing my emotions and my denial when Dr. Afary gave us assignments to journal, according to the week’s chapter. Writing this story was a way for me to cope with the difficult situation and to find peace.
My story represents the redemption process, the good, the bad, and the ugly. While there are many of us who have changed from the person we were when we committed our crimes, it does not mean that we are not still held accountable for all our actions. My story shows the resilience of those who fail when faced with obstacles yet continue to live positive and productive lives while incarcerated.
Sharing such a vulnerable experience was a scary idea. I actually had second thoughts about if I wanted to share this story with the public. However, seeing the effort and care the students took to create and bring my story to life was inspiring. I’m grateful to be a part of this project and to share my story.
6.
DEVELOPING EMOTIONAL AWARENESS AND INTELLIGENCE
6.
DEVELOPING EMOTIONAL AWARENESS AND INTELLIGENCE
CSULBS: Brittany Barrera
I'm a proud Latina, born and raised in downtown LA. My goal in life is to share and create my own original stories, whether it be through animation or comics.
My creation process was solely based on my emotional experience growing up. It was similar enough that I pulled my outlook of those times with a serious black and white tone of what it was like to just living day to day in dread. I personally related to the story of the animation.
I'm a proud Latina, born and raised in downtown LA. My goal in life is to share and create my own original stories, whether it be through animation or comics.
My creation process was solely based on my emotional experience growing up. It was similar enough that I pulled my outlook of those times with a serious black and white tone of what it was like to just living day to day in dread. I personally related to the story of the animation.
LS: Clifton Gibson
Hi my name is Clifton, graduate of CSULA, now in the social justice non-profit industry. Writing the piece for the animation project was a journey of catharsis and trauma reminding. It feels painful when I talk about the abuse that I suffered but cathartic to release its grip from my heart. Brene Brown wrote that shame is like a fungus only living in darkness, I feel the same way about my painful and shameful moments. When I talk about them they not only help release me from the attachment and hopefully they encourage others to free themselves from their own.
Hi my name is Clifton, graduate of CSULA, now in the social justice non-profit industry. Writing the piece for the animation project was a journey of catharsis and trauma reminding. It feels painful when I talk about the abuse that I suffered but cathartic to release its grip from my heart. Brene Brown wrote that shame is like a fungus only living in darkness, I feel the same way about my painful and shameful moments. When I talk about them they not only help release me from the attachment and hopefully they encourage others to free themselves from their own.
7.
I’M SENSORY OVERLOAD BEHIND BARS
7.
I’M SENSORY OVERLOAD BEHIND BARS
LS: Risala Rose-Aminifu
Written and narrated by “Risala Rose-Aminifu”, a 47-year-old African-American undergraduate at California State University Los Angeles, Lancaster campus. This story describes what I sensed at a particular moment inside my cell. I attempted to give the viewer a brief glimpse into my sensory overload within the confines of prison. It depicts what I saw, smelled, and heard at that time. I am a former inmate sentenced to life without the possibility of parole who received commutation in 2018. I am looking forward to finishing up my bachelor’s degree on campus and regaining my freedom in the summer of 2021.
Written and narrated by “Risala Rose-Aminifu”, a 47-year-old African-American undergraduate at California State University Los Angeles, Lancaster campus. This story describes what I sensed at a particular moment inside my cell. I attempted to give the viewer a brief glimpse into my sensory overload within the confines of prison. It depicts what I saw, smelled, and heard at that time. I am a former inmate sentenced to life without the possibility of parole who received commutation in 2018. I am looking forward to finishing up my bachelor’s degree on campus and regaining my freedom in the summer of 2021.
8.
FINDING COMON GROUND ON THE PRISON GROUNDS
8.
FINDING COMON GROUND ON THE PRISON GROUNDS
LS: Deon Whitmore
I have been incarcerated since I was 15 years old, I am now 35. I have learned so much about myself over the past 20 years. I have learned about my strengths and weaknesses, self-identity, traumas and new belief systems. Growing up inside this system, my life is full of uncertainty. I have struggled mentally and emotionally for so long because I didn’t know how to express myself. Education became a safe space amid the chaos going on around and within me. I was introduced to narrative therapy by Dr. Kamran Afary and Elizabeth Malone. It has been life-changing for me. Through this form of communication, I have found the courage to express myself and tell my story.
The creation of the story I shared for this project was the process of preparing myself for every morning. It has become routine. The measures I needed to take daily to protect myself were for my own safety and well-being. I did this process as a means of survival. Now in college, learning concepts relating to communication styles, I’m able to identify these situations before putting myself in harm’s way. I chose to write about my personal experience because it is something I know a lot of men struggle with daily. I’m fortunate enough to have learned about tools for preparing myself for those moments and I feel it is important to share my experiences because people can learn from it. I have become more understanding of other’s thoughts and feelings, even if I don’t agree with them; I have built some tolerance. I experience this story every day, the difference now is that I’m able to grow from it. I was excited to share this story because I knew many people who could relate to it. I was speaking for others who couldn’t express their feelings or didn’t have the opportunity. My reality is shared by so many.
I have been incarcerated since I was 15 years old, I am now 35. I have learned so much about myself over the past 20 years. I have learned about my strengths and weaknesses, self-identity, traumas and new belief systems. Growing up inside this system, my life is full of uncertainty. I have struggled mentally and emotionally for so long because I didn’t know how to express myself. Education became a safe space amid the chaos going on around and within me. I was introduced to narrative therapy by Dr. Kamran Afary and Elizabeth Malone. It has been life-changing for me. Through this form of communication, I have found the courage to express myself and tell my story.
The creation of the story I shared for this project was the process of preparing myself for every morning. It has become routine. The measures I needed to take daily to protect myself were for my own safety and well-being. I did this process as a means of survival. Now in college, learning concepts relating to communication styles, I’m able to identify these situations before putting myself in harm’s way. I chose to write about my personal experience because it is something I know a lot of men struggle with daily. I’m fortunate enough to have learned about tools for preparing myself for those moments and I feel it is important to share my experiences because people can learn from it. I have become more understanding of other’s thoughts and feelings, even if I don’t agree with them; I have built some tolerance. I experience this story every day, the difference now is that I’m able to grow from it. I was excited to share this story because I knew many people who could relate to it. I was speaking for others who couldn’t express their feelings or didn’t have the opportunity. My reality is shared by so many.
9.
COMMUNICATING THROUGH NONVERBALS AND EMOTIONS
9.
COMMUNICATING THROUGH NONVERBALS AND EMOTIONS
CSULBS: Sandra Delgado
I'm a first-generation CSULA student to go to college with the pursuit of an animation degree.
The creation process was plenty of planning and creative thinking. I wanted to create an image of Duncan of his childhood and his healthy sibling bond by creating a "coloring on paper like animation." Not only I learned from Duncan and his experience but I also learned I was able to bring his story to life. I learned from other people's stories, it brings curiosity to me as well as what I can create from it.
I'm a first-generation CSULA student to go to college with the pursuit of an animation degree.
The creation process was plenty of planning and creative thinking. I wanted to create an image of Duncan of his childhood and his healthy sibling bond by creating a "coloring on paper like animation." Not only I learned from Duncan and his experience but I also learned I was able to bring his story to life. I learned from other people's stories, it brings curiosity to me as well as what I can create from it.
LS: Duncan Martinez
Duncan Martinez is 50 years old and has spent more than half his life in prison. Despite this, he speaks as frequently as possible, and believes that every voice needs to be heard. About to graduate from Cal State LA, he has never used a cell-phone , and still holds unabashedly to the belief that digital watches are a pretty neat idea.
Duncan Martinez is 50 years old and has spent more than half his life in prison. Despite this, he speaks as frequently as possible, and believes that every voice needs to be heard. About to graduate from Cal State LA, he has never used a cell-phone , and still holds unabashedly to the belief that digital watches are a pretty neat idea.
CSULBS: Chris Ramirez
I am a transfer student at Cal State LA and I am fulfilling my desire of working with animation. My creative process was to try and convey the emotional pain of Jeff Ayers in a way that can be visualized. For this I emphasized color in order to visualize the emotional aspect of Jeff's story. In addition to this I wanted this color to be displayed all over the place or thrown around to really show Jeff's emotions and his self-esteem being fluctuating. As far as my creative process it was interesting one because it was smooth until the end when my computer just didn't want to function properly. But thankfully it turned out to be fine. What I learned from this is words can have a profound effect on how one perceives their life and words can affect us in different ways.
I am a transfer student at Cal State LA and I am fulfilling my desire of working with animation. My creative process was to try and convey the emotional pain of Jeff Ayers in a way that can be visualized. For this I emphasized color in order to visualize the emotional aspect of Jeff's story. In addition to this I wanted this color to be displayed all over the place or thrown around to really show Jeff's emotions and his self-esteem being fluctuating. As far as my creative process it was interesting one because it was smooth until the end when my computer just didn't want to function properly. But thankfully it turned out to be fine. What I learned from this is words can have a profound effect on how one perceives their life and words can affect us in different ways.
LS: Jeff Ayers
Aside from being a proud member of Cal State LA and the second cohort here at California State Prison, Los Angeles County. I am also the self proclaimed Alpha Nerd (and proud of it!) and diehard Green Bay Packers fan.
I have wanted to be many things in my life, but university student was never on the list. That is ,until 2017, when I seized the opportunity to be part of this groundbreaking Bachelor Degree program. With this part of my academic journey nearly over, I cannot wait to see what the next leg has in store.
Aside from being a proud member of Cal State LA and the second cohort here at California State Prison, Los Angeles County. I am also the self proclaimed Alpha Nerd (and proud of it!) and diehard Green Bay Packers fan.
I have wanted to be many things in my life, but university student was never on the list. That is ,until 2017, when I seized the opportunity to be part of this groundbreaking Bachelor Degree program. With this part of my academic journey nearly over, I cannot wait to see what the next leg has in store.
LS: Dara Yin
Dara Yin is a 38 year old Cal State Los Angeles Student. He committed his crime at the age of 18 and is serving a Life without Parole sentence. For the last five years he has been working with youth through a youth diversion program at Lancaster Prison. He is also a dog trainer with Paws For Life. He facilitates various programs to help the incarcerated men find change. Programs such as C.R.T (Community Restoration Training), A.V.P (Alternative to Violence Project), and G.O.G.I (Getting Out By Going In). Embodying change and helping others is how he chooses to live his life new.
Dara Yin is a 38 year old Cal State Los Angeles Student. He committed his crime at the age of 18 and is serving a Life without Parole sentence. For the last five years he has been working with youth through a youth diversion program at Lancaster Prison. He is also a dog trainer with Paws For Life. He facilitates various programs to help the incarcerated men find change. Programs such as C.R.T (Community Restoration Training), A.V.P (Alternative to Violence Project), and G.O.G.I (Getting Out By Going In). Embodying change and helping others is how he chooses to live his life new.
LS: Jimmie L. Gilmer Jr.
I was born in Los Angeles, and grew up in the late 70s and early 80s. These decades were the bad times during the drug epidemic that gripped the gang lands of L.A....I grew up between LA and Compton; I had a speech impediment so I did not talk much. Nevertheless, I was an excellent athlete and because of that I was able to stay out of the gang life. I was not a great student. My speech impediment, along with my dyslexia, slowed me considerably. Kids can be cruel. I grew up with both my parents, a rarity in Compton and in LA. I worked with my father. We own a company called G and Sons. A bus charter company, mainly our routes went to Las Vegas, and around the State of California. If I could turn back the clock, I would open up my ears and never close them to what my parents were trying to teach me. Because, if I had listened to mom and dad, I would not have woke up in prison one day, and I would not have been waking up here for the last 30 years. However, even in adversity, I turned it around. I have earned three Associate of Art Degrees, and I am now one semester away from obtaining my Bachelor Degree in Organizational Communication. I am a member of the Leadership Legacy Counsel, a group of men in the prison who actively raise funds for charities and needy organizations within our local communities.
Believe
By: Jimmie L Gilmer Jr.
I am trying to believe in me. Because at times, I have had doubts. I wonder if anyone notices it. In my conscious eye, they do. My conscious is awake and tells me that everyone knows. Only intelligent beings can be fully conscious and aware, am I? Because if I was truly conscious and aware, I would not find myself in this predicament, situation, tight spot, unfortunate, unfavorable, hostile, immoral cage made by man. I must be asleep.
I am trying to believe in me. However, it is hard being me. I thought I knew it all, I was young then— I was wrong. I had the wrong state of mind, started off on the wrong foot, headed down the wrong street, and I made the wrong decisions in life. And today, I find myself in a hostile, immoral cage made by man for the wrongs that men do.
I am trying to believe in me, and I am holding on to my sanity. So that I may believe that I will say the right things, do the right things, to be on the right side of things. To wake up on the right side of the bed, in the right state of mind, to start my day off on the right foot, to make the right decisions, and hopefully, I will end up believing what those that believe in me, see in me.
I was born in Los Angeles, and grew up in the late 70s and early 80s. These decades were the bad times during the drug epidemic that gripped the gang lands of L.A....I grew up between LA and Compton; I had a speech impediment so I did not talk much. Nevertheless, I was an excellent athlete and because of that I was able to stay out of the gang life. I was not a great student. My speech impediment, along with my dyslexia, slowed me considerably. Kids can be cruel. I grew up with both my parents, a rarity in Compton and in LA. I worked with my father. We own a company called G and Sons. A bus charter company, mainly our routes went to Las Vegas, and around the State of California. If I could turn back the clock, I would open up my ears and never close them to what my parents were trying to teach me. Because, if I had listened to mom and dad, I would not have woke up in prison one day, and I would not have been waking up here for the last 30 years. However, even in adversity, I turned it around. I have earned three Associate of Art Degrees, and I am now one semester away from obtaining my Bachelor Degree in Organizational Communication. I am a member of the Leadership Legacy Counsel, a group of men in the prison who actively raise funds for charities and needy organizations within our local communities.
Believe
By: Jimmie L Gilmer Jr.
I am trying to believe in me. Because at times, I have had doubts. I wonder if anyone notices it. In my conscious eye, they do. My conscious is awake and tells me that everyone knows. Only intelligent beings can be fully conscious and aware, am I? Because if I was truly conscious and aware, I would not find myself in this predicament, situation, tight spot, unfortunate, unfavorable, hostile, immoral cage made by man. I must be asleep.
I am trying to believe in me. However, it is hard being me. I thought I knew it all, I was young then— I was wrong. I had the wrong state of mind, started off on the wrong foot, headed down the wrong street, and I made the wrong decisions in life. And today, I find myself in a hostile, immoral cage made by man for the wrongs that men do.
I am trying to believe in me, and I am holding on to my sanity. So that I may believe that I will say the right things, do the right things, to be on the right side of things. To wake up on the right side of the bed, in the right state of mind, to start my day off on the right foot, to make the right decisions, and hopefully, I will end up believing what those that believe in me, see in me.
13.
I’M SENSORY OVERLOAD BEHIND BARS
13.
I’M SENSORY OVERLOAD BEHIND BARS
LS: Risala Rose-Aminifu
Written and narrated by “Risala Rose-Aminifu”, a 47-year-old African-American undergraduate at California State University Los Angeles, Lancaster campus. This story describes what I sensed at a particular moment inside my cell. I attempted to give the viewer a brief glimpse into my sensory overload within the confines of prison. It depicts what I saw, smelled, and heard at that time. I am a former inmate sentenced to life without the possibility of parole who received commutation in 2018. I am looking forward to finishing up my bachelor’s degree on campus and regaining my freedom in the summer of 2021.
Written and narrated by “Risala Rose-Aminifu”, a 47-year-old African-American undergraduate at California State University Los Angeles, Lancaster campus. This story describes what I sensed at a particular moment inside my cell. I attempted to give the viewer a brief glimpse into my sensory overload within the confines of prison. It depicts what I saw, smelled, and heard at that time. I am a former inmate sentenced to life without the possibility of parole who received commutation in 2018. I am looking forward to finishing up my bachelor’s degree on campus and regaining my freedom in the summer of 2021.